The following is a beautifully sad letter written by a woman to her ex boyfriend who broke her heart, we call it “I want to forget you”.
I want to forget you : A sad letter to my ex boyfriend who broke my heart
Some feelings leave an undying trace engraved in the heart itself. Some sensations push us to the ground when our world falls apart. You were that kind of sensation, an unfading feeling in my heart. You turned my life upside down when you penetrated my world, you brought to it both an intense new brightness and a darkness it had never known. You are a pain running through me, and missing you is like being pierced by arrows bearing hurtful messages written in your hand. I have idealized you, wanted you and called for you at my side. I have asked and you have ignored… To me you are life as pain is to joy, a lingering shadow.
I hate you, I hate you for the hollow you have created in me, I hate you for having put part of me out.
I wish I could scream my pain at you as loud as I can. I wish you could see the pain you caused me through the tears leaking from my eyes. I wish you could understand that it isn’t love but that it very much looks like it…
I have lied to you and I have lied to myself when I told you that seeing you with Her made me happy for you, but I know now that your happiness could never have been mine, if I wasn’t in your life. How could I wish happiness to the person I have feelings for when he’s in the arms of another? I thought I could be strong enough for you to realize that, but you were my weakness and it got the better of me.
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It hurts that you’re not there, that you don’t text, that you don’t call, that you don’t talk… With or without you it hurts…
Taking the decision of not counting on you to be there for me has been like having a sword above my head : I had to let it fall to be able to stand back up again. That is my strategy to forget you. My strategy to heal the wounds you inflicted me.
It doesn’t prevent pain nor questions. I don’t know if it’s the best solution but I convince myself every second that is is in order to put an end to my doubt. If only I could wish you happiness… but it’s beyond my strength because I wish it had been me, so I will only wish you to try and find it, while whishing myself the same.
I won’t be easy, I am aware of that, but hopefully time will be my alie and this pain will turn into experience. To you, ideal one, I wish the realization of what I could have brought you, had you granted me the chance of being yours.