Wether you’re in a relationship or not, at some point or another, you might have asked yourself what love is, and what it’s all about. Love… what a vast topic that is… Where shall I start to tell you about such a strong feeling…? A feeling that empowers and destroys you? That makes you feel as light as a feather and sends you crashing back down to earth…? That puts a stupid smile on your face and then provokes a flow of tears? So what is love all about in a relationship ?
Love is the strongest, the less controllable, the most beautiful, the most terrible adventure you could ever go on. Wonderful, exciting, thrilling, it’s a source of happiness. It’s also sneaky, lunatic, ravaging and makes you suffer. But is life even worth living without it…?
The human being feeds as much on the love he gives as on the love he receives… So why can it be so scary? And hurtful… to love… my God… to Love… You love your mother, you love your brother, your grandparents… You love your friends, you love your dog… You have already loved so much before him, before her… But the day you love a man, a woman… On that day, what process does your heart, within your body go through to make you feel this flaming love, to the point of not being able to go on without it…? How can you, while you still love all the people close to you, have this strange and guilt inducing notion that they aren’t enough anymore? Yes, I love you guys, but without him, without her I would be nothing… And yet I am a fully grown human being. I am me… With my ideas, my past, my values, my straightforward personality. How could I forget myself like that…? It took up so much space that it ended up invading my very self.
What is love?
Love is to endlessly try to catch the eyes of that very special someone and running away from him at the same time. It’s finding yourself in front of him with wobbly knees. It’s losing your self-confidence, stumbling on words and not knowing what to do with your hands while trying to express the extent of your love to him. It’s plunging in the depth of his eyes and shyly letting go… Its being blind to everything but his enthralling grace. It’s feeling, at the sheer sound of his name or voice, the quickening of your heart rate. It’s perspiring and shivering and having moist shaky hands whenever you spot him from a distance. It’s going to the other side of the country to steal a few days, a few hours, a few minutes in his company. It’s feeling your entire body quiver when he brushes against you, so close. It’s to fill up with hope at the slightest word, the slightest element of body language that could lead you to think that he has even the smallest trace of feelings for you. It’s when even dressed in the most ridiculous outfit, you still think he’s the most handsome man on earth.
Love is feeling capable of giving without a second thought your life for the person you love. It’s wanting to seize every opportunity of seeing a smile light up his face. It’s walking in a shop and wondering what he would like, before even thinking about treating yourself to anything. Love is constantly worrying wether the other is OK. It’s suffering from not being able to feel his pain in his stead when he has a bad fever, when he’s in danger or when he’s unbearably ill.
Love is very often proiritizing the loved one over yourself.
And yet, love is also being constantly afraid for your own future if the person your heart has chosen, most unfortunately slips away from you. Love is being isanely jealous at the sheer thought of the man or woman of your life being remotely attracted to somebody else. Love is an oversized fear of being abandoned. It’s feeling like you could die of sadness if the object of your torments doesn’t share (or has never shared) your feelings. Love is closing your eyes every night with wonderful images on your mind. And it’s opening them every morning thinking of that special someone. It’s sometimes not sleeping at all. Love is refusing “plenty of fish in the sea…”, “the best is yet to come…”, “time heals all wounds…” or “you deserve better…”. All the benevolent clichés your relatives can think of that are nontheless useless and commonplace.
Love is feeling that never again will you be able to love someone so much. It’s feeling amputated when he or she isn’t around. Love is being in his arms, touching his skin and knowing with the uttermost conviction that nothing can harm you as long as the two of you are together. It’s being all too aware that his scent, his body language, his physical particularities are his alone and could never be replaced.
Love is feeling so good… and hurting so bad.
Love, or so they say, can happen several times in a life… and take different forms. When it turns it’s back on you, some will tell you to keep pushing, others that you’re betting on the wrong horse. Listen to whom you please… and listen to your heart.
Lonely souls, happy couples, passionate lovers, hopeless romantics… Love is cruel, love is beautiful, love is strong, love is fragile. It needs to be loved. Love love.